I've been wanting to write since before Valentines Day. I submitted 'our love story' to KLOVE's contest for Matthew West to write a love song about someone's love story. I did last year too, no win either year. But it had me thinking...
Our love story is so far from pretty or perfect. Child before marriage, destructive behaviors, alcohol abuse...all of the above are neatly packaged terms that mean we were young and wreckless. We met in a bar. Does that sum it up pretty well? We were each complete in emotional baggage that came along for the first several years of our relationship. It was not an easy road to say the least.
What I think is unique about our love story is how God's love for us, brought us together and kept us together. I believe whole-heartedly that our son Jakob was God's gift and reminder that we were meant for one another, and left up to us we would have inevitably messed it up without him.
My husband is not perfect, actually not even close. But he is everything I could ever ask for in my partner. I've watched God grow both of us spiritually and emotionally, together and apart. Justin saves me from myself regularly. My wires get crossed, I run around with my head cut off, I stress...and there he is, calm, collected and ready to quiet his wild eyed and wreckless-souled wife. We compliment each other so well. Alike and yet so different.
In the course of recent events I have found myself really convicted of the wife I am. Looking in, I am a good wife. I try hard, I am considerate, I do housework, I cook, I care for our children...so on and so on. God has challenged me lately to really put my faith in Him and trust that He is sufficent in growing my husband without 'my help'. While everything looks the same on the outside, things have drastically changed on the inside. I have never seen my husband so happy, responsive and spiritual.
God is the center of our marriage. He is the center of our family. The love that is flowing makes my cup runneth over. I am more in love with my husband than I've ever been. He is an amazing man, an amazing father and I have faith in who he is. Not who I believe I can change him to be.
We like to dance. As a family, and just the two of us. We like honky tonk places and beautiful wide open places. We like laughing and playing. We have dinner together every night and I am in awe of God's unconditional love for us.
Seven years later, I had no idea life could be this wonderful. Still far from perfect but complete in our foundation. We still struggle with ourselves, our vices, our emotional hang ups, but with God's amazing grace, we are where we are today. Meant to be together like red on a rose.
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
Friday, February 5, 2010
Friends
I am reminded this morning that God is in control, and we are not. A friend is suffering deeply and my heart is heavy with grief for her loss. I have several friends who are weathering storms right now. I feel myself called to their side for whatever it is I can do to be a friend. Sometimes it is the support a phone call or even a quick text can give. Other times it is only through praying for one another. I fell to my knees this morning and prayed for my friend. I have been on the other side of those essential life giving prayers so many times, that I know their power! I've experienced the power of prayer personally.
Sometimes I find myself akward when feeling the inevitable nudge the Lord is giving me to pray for a friend in need. Maybe they don't believe, maybe they aren't followers, maybe I won't find the right words, maybe I'll sound dumb, maybe I'll make it worse by making them way too uncomfortable, maybe they'll think I'm weird...MAYBE I should just be obedient and let God be God and do what He does best, give mercy and grace to those in need! I prayed over a friend the other day and much to my surprise the words flowed from me, they weren't my own. I was able to lift her up at a very crucial time when she needed God's presence. It wasn't about me helping her, it was about inviting the Holy Spirit into her situation. I was simply driving down the road on with my friend on speaker phone. The Lord was nudging me harder than I could bear to ignore. Hallelujah, I was obedient and He was with her.
I find that when I am walking by faith, my life is often a mess and difficult in ways that I hadn't imagined possible. Yet, I am not walking alone. I am walking very aware of who is right beside me. I don't ever want to walk any other path. I've been down both, and I will walk through any fire, blind with only faith, so long as He is by my side. I pray that my friends in need, my friends who waiver on the fence, are encouraged with the presence of their Heavenly Father who promises to never foresake them! These are beautiful, intelligent, loving young women, who may not know the Lord yet. Instead of being leary of what they may think, I will be obedient to what I know. That there is a grace filled God who loves them and wants to help them in ways that I cannot. God is love and God is just.
I want to encourage us to be friends to one another. Whether it is praying over each other, or a silent prayer behind a closed door that they never know about. I encourage you to pray for each other diligently, it is the best gift you can offer your loved ones. At the cross He beckons us, draws us gently to our knees, lost for words, lost in love, sweety broken...holy surrender.
"But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness." Hebrews 3:13
Sometimes I find myself akward when feeling the inevitable nudge the Lord is giving me to pray for a friend in need. Maybe they don't believe, maybe they aren't followers, maybe I won't find the right words, maybe I'll sound dumb, maybe I'll make it worse by making them way too uncomfortable, maybe they'll think I'm weird...MAYBE I should just be obedient and let God be God and do what He does best, give mercy and grace to those in need! I prayed over a friend the other day and much to my surprise the words flowed from me, they weren't my own. I was able to lift her up at a very crucial time when she needed God's presence. It wasn't about me helping her, it was about inviting the Holy Spirit into her situation. I was simply driving down the road on with my friend on speaker phone. The Lord was nudging me harder than I could bear to ignore. Hallelujah, I was obedient and He was with her.
I find that when I am walking by faith, my life is often a mess and difficult in ways that I hadn't imagined possible. Yet, I am not walking alone. I am walking very aware of who is right beside me. I don't ever want to walk any other path. I've been down both, and I will walk through any fire, blind with only faith, so long as He is by my side. I pray that my friends in need, my friends who waiver on the fence, are encouraged with the presence of their Heavenly Father who promises to never foresake them! These are beautiful, intelligent, loving young women, who may not know the Lord yet. Instead of being leary of what they may think, I will be obedient to what I know. That there is a grace filled God who loves them and wants to help them in ways that I cannot. God is love and God is just.
I want to encourage us to be friends to one another. Whether it is praying over each other, or a silent prayer behind a closed door that they never know about. I encourage you to pray for each other diligently, it is the best gift you can offer your loved ones. At the cross He beckons us, draws us gently to our knees, lost for words, lost in love, sweety broken...holy surrender.
"But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called Today, so that none of you may be hardened by sin's deceitfulness." Hebrews 3:13
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)